The Second Question

I learned a long time ago that one of the most powerful relational tools we have is what I call “The Second Question.” Most of us are good at first questions, like “How are you today?” or, with our kids, “What did you do in school today?” The trouble comes with the answers that follow: the dreaded “Fine” or “Nothing.” How do we move the conversation forward from there?

A good second question helps us open up and connect more deeply. “What did you do in school today?” can become “What happened today that made you laugh?” Now we’re on our way to a real conversation. Sometimes though, the second ask isn’t a new question. It’s the same one, with more room to answer.

Scripture records many moments when God asks people questions. He asks Adam and Eve, “Who told you that you were naked?” He asks Cain where his brother is, Hagar where she is going, and Abraham why Sarah laughed. He asks Moses what is in his hand, Samuel how long he will grieve over King Saul’s failure, and Ezekiel whether dry bones can live.

If you study these moments, you’ll notice that God already knows the answer. The question is never just about information. God’s questions aren’t a way of dodging ours. They’re how he gets to the real problem.

This Sunday, we’ll find Elijah hiding from Jezebel in a cave on Mount Horeb, far from Israel. It may be the very place where Moses met God in Exodus 33-34. There, God asks Elijah a simple question: “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

Does God know the answer? Of course. But he asks again, and again after something unexpected. As Elijah meets the God who speaks in a whisper, we’ll see how patiently God reminds his prophet that he is still at work, and that is encouragement we may all need.